As I sit here in the dark typing, I feel my whole world is asleep. I am not needed quite yet. A set of sea blue eyes that match my own are still closed tight, still sleeping and dreaming. This is a special day for me. It marks the day one year ago when Heavenly Father gave me one of his beloved children to me. The day I got to deliver my sweet Barrett. Angels surrounded me that day in the Hospital room. I felt the support of all the women who have gone on before me. Women who whispered to my heart "you can do this Erin, your body was created for this, only you can bring this child into this world." I felt the support all around me. I felt it in my heart, on my womb, my face, my shoulders. Every time I felt "I dont know if I can do this" I felt their Love surround me. And my sweet husband was there holding my hand, my one true rock that held me to this earth. I had a beautiful natural delivery. I felt every moment, every step in the process of this journey in bearing my son. He was not alone in his pain of being born. I felt it along with him. For me, I wanted that. I needed that. Call it what you will. This is my story. Everyone has their way..this was mine. I wanted to share this journey with my son. I wanted to hear my body tell me the things I needed to do. And I did. I could have been all alone in the woods and had my son. It was like something woke up inside me. My body. It said okay Erin I know what to do. Trust me. And I did. There is a confidence in me that there wasnt before I became a Mom. It is a inner flame that was ignited inside me. I realized just how special being a woman was, being a daughter of God. I realized how amazing our bodies are. I was pulled beyond the limits I thought I had of pain, tiredness, patience. I went further than I ever thought I could. What obstacle in this life could ever hold me back again? After Barrett was born, I wouldnt let them take him away right away. I needed my son. And he needed me. We had just shared our closest bonding experience we would ever have in this life. I looked down at him. I looked into those eyes and my heart burst. "I know you, Ive seen you before. You are my baby, and you have always been mine."
My sweet Barret,
Happy Birthday my little Bear. I Love you to the Moon and Back.
You are my joy in this life.
I hate to see my baby leaving but I Love watching the Big boy you are turning into.
I have never laughed so much with anyone than I have with you. You are such a sweet spirit. I already see your personality in life coming out. You Love everyone. No matter who we meet you do anything you can to make them smile and laugh. You give me kisses and hugs when I need them most. Ive always marveled that you know when mommy is needing them. You are the very best part of me sweet boy.
Love Momma Bear.
Chea Lamb Photography
Kim Skinner Photography
